When searching for the ideal relationship, most of us find there are many frogs we must kiss is the process.
Unfortunately, researchers have found that six out of 10 adults is in a relationship that they deem unhealthy. The study of 3,000 people makes it appear that the majority of individuals choose to stick with the frog, rather than trekking out to find a more compatible partner.
Is it that we don’t see the red flags when we come in contact with a troublemaker? Or do we not see the true value that we behold? Regardless, with the help of relationship experts, we will identify five key signs to look for in a “loser.”
1. He is Gainfully Unemployed with No Savings in the Bank
Romance tends to only go so far in the world of relationships. Once the buzz wears off, things like bank accounts and money contributions become hugely important.
According to renowned psychotherapist Olivia Mellan, money drives more couples apart than sex. Not only do money woes impact a woman’s respect for her man, they also tend to drive a man’s self-esteem into the ground.
While money isn’t everything, it is extremely important that you consider future troubles that can result via financial inequality. If your man’s money woes are coupled with lack of ambition in general, definitely consider running for the local hills.
2. He Lives at Home with His Parents
Unless one of his parents are sick or impaired and desperately need his help to survive, you may want to flee. I say “may want to flee” for one simple reason: Maybe he’s saving up for a house and he’s putting aside every penny? And if he’s a teenager and you are too, of course living at home with the fam is acceptable.
However, in the case that he’s a full-blown adult sitting around watching TV in his underwear while his mother does his laundry and fixes his dinner, you may want to give the situation tons of thought.
3. He’s a Slob
Marriage and family therapist Tina Tessina of Long Beach, Calif. revealed to NBC’s Today that a whopping one in three couples she works with struggle with cleanliness issues. “It’s a big issue especially with new couples,” said Tessina.
“Cleanliness is next to godliness,” once observed an ancient sage. The wisdom behind this simple phrase is that a man (or woman) who lives in a world of filth and disorganization is usually the possessor of a fragmented and undisciplined mind.
Let’s face it, slovenly behavior may be charmingly cute in the beginning, but when you’re picking up his dirty underwear off the floor and continuously cleaning his grimy dishes left in the sink, you may find yourself ready to explode.
4. He’s Negative and Demeaning
Your self-worth is without a doubt THE most important part of your being. There is never a good reason for someone you love and adore, putting you down and making you feel worthless.
In her PsychCentral article, Marie Hartwell-Walker notes that initially amazing connections can turn into abusive situations. When this happens, the partner being verbally attacked constantly hopes the loving-being they fell in love with will return. The longer the two of you stay together, the worse the abuse may become.
Life is so very short. Seek a partner that lifts you up and inspires you to go for your dreams.
5. He Wants to Isolate and Control You
If you ever find yourself in a relationship staring in the mirror and you realize you are only a fraction of the person you used to be, your partner may stifling your authenticity. Pay close attention to whether he constantly tries to isolate you and deter you from connecting with friends, family, and new experiences.
Your ideal partner should absolutely love who you are and encourage you to spread your wings.
There are numerous other factors to consider when deciding whether to run or stay for the long-haul. If you’re confused, make a full list of the qualities you are seeking and where you plan to take life. Dare to move on if your current prospect doesn’t fit your needs.
You only live once! Don’t buy into the logic that you’ll never find another partner. Know what you want, be patient, and your best partner just may arrive with bells on.More Like This: Love